I now understand Trump's railings against socialist Britain.

He has obviously been told that we keep inviting reds back here. 

Perhaps he has even spotted one on his golf course!

 

Personally, I would prefer it if those were of the grey variety ... .  However, in Jersey, when I visited that island for my aunt's funeral, there were dozens of the red ones, scampering all over the trees in the distance.

 

There's a significant population of reds on the Isle of Wight* too. I'm a frequent visitor and have yet to see one there. The Isle is said to be grey free.

I spent several months in Cumbria and the Lake District in 2022 as well, where there's also a significant population of reds. Didn't see one there either.

Elusive beggars!



*One of the HMP Isle of Wight sites is called Albany, CfN. Perhaps there are some reds doing bird there.

 
That is indeed what I meant: thanks, ChrisB. 

 
Or even Alderney

 
From the BBC:


They are also very active in Jersey (Channel Islands). I don't know about Guernsey, Albany or the Isles of Scilly.

 
According to the BBC, a guerrilla force of reds has been infiltrating Yorkshire. Oddly (given the known habits of media folk) they did not pick up on how propitious today is for the story.

 

... which in turn reminds me of a bumper sticker I saw, online, many years ago. I can't find it now, but it was on the back of an Amish horse-drawn buggy and read, "How's my driving?", with a freephone number for responses. The Amish community have generally retained a sense of humour. 

 

Together with the landlord at the Highbury Vaults, I've been working on that for years.

 
Reminds me of a bumper sticker I saw many years ago in the States:  "Preserve wildlife - pickle a squirrel".  Colour was not defined.

 
With some hesitation, I post here that today is ... erm ... squirrel appreciation day.

My learned friend Red Squirrel here on the Coffee Shop forum is obviously of our native variety, rather than those invasive grey tree rat intruders - although the author of that post, from the USA, interestingly chooses to illustrate it with an image of a red squirrel.

Please, have a good day, all red squirrels!

 
I seem to remember back in the 1990s Great Eastern Railway having the idea of using commuters as guards although it never came to anything.

 
Next they'll be asking passengers to drive the trains!

Might help with regular driver shortages.

 
Continuing to widen the theme of weird messaging, this appeared on Journeycheck.com/greatwesternrailway today:

 

The stabiliser rail always causes problems.

At a guess the set was pinched to restart a Pompey Cardiff at the Temple Meads of Doom.

 
Yes, that third rail at Nailsea & Backwell has always been a bit of an issue ... 

 

 

 
You called?

Absolute fare dodger if I’ve ever seen one.

Not the first time a seagull has travelled on a train of course:
https://youtu.be/qsztO2d9KaM?si=baBYTA9KNuTbf_Sg

 
PLEASE, don't tell Timmer. 

 

 
And now it's a seagull on a Hastings-Victoria train.

 
An old joke about one of the books allegedly written by W E Johns - 'Biggles flies undone'. 

 
Hmm… undone by flies, one might say.

 
No reference to the inadvisability of planting triffids in your garden, then? 

 
Time flies Fruit Flys like a Banana,unless they catch a train that is
Or it might just be a case of Flys go mad in Devon
Now where did I leave my coat.

 
Hmm.  That reflects on their cleaning staff team, methinks? 

 
...now

 

I don't believe there is a legal classification of "vermin" these days. However, grey squirrels are on the "Union list" of invasive species, which does make releasing them an offence under the Wildlife and Countryside Act 1981 and Invasive Alien Species (Enforcement and Permitting) Order 2019. There are surprisingly few alien animals on that list (though rather more plants):

Crab, Chinese Mitten    Eriocheir sinensis
Crayfish, Red Swamp    Procambarus clarkii
Crayfish, Signal    Pacifastacus leniusculus
Crayfish, Spiny-cheek    Orconectes limosus
Deer, Muntjac    Muntiacus reevesi
Duck, Ruddy    Oxyura jamaicensis
Flatworm, New Zealand     Arthurdendyus triangulates
Goose, Egyptian    Alopochen aegyptiacus
Pumpkinseed     Lepomis gibbosus
Squirrel, Grey    Sciurus carolinensis

The Wildlife and Countryside Act 1981 is a very schizophrenic bit of legislation: most of it is about not doing nasty things to any kind of wildlife, and then it flips over when it comes to the aliens and makes some nasty things (within limits, of course) compulsory. It also contains a much longer list of aliens, containing some surprising entries - such as the Capercaillie Tetrao urogallus. I guess that's about licensing and controls, and perhaps in that case the rules differ in Scotland.

There was Japanese Knotweed in a neighbouring site, supposedly removed in the approved manner before it was built on. But I was surprised to find the Cotoneaster horizontalis in my garden is listed as an invasive alien. In this case the control regime just tells you not to plant it outside your garden, but that's not easy to deduce starting from the list.

 

I have been forced to conclude that grey squirrels are indeed suicidal - either that or they are just incredibly stupid; the Exeter area has over the last several months seen an obvious growth in the grey squirrel population but a significant number of the blighters end up as road kill e.g. on a 2 1/2 hour cycle ride this morning I counted 11 greys that had failed to observe the highway code.

Perhaps they are biologically related to lemmings?

 
Being classed as vermin, it is illegal to release (grey) squirrels once trapped/caught/etc - so those two must have had a suicide pact...

 
Sounds like an urban fringe bustup. A couple of the Gomshall Greys travelled to stage a raid on the Redhill Reds, then, as usual, the greys' tiny brains lost the plot and they ended up having a set-to with the passengers on the train. Unpleasant for all concerned.

Hope someone called the British Transport Police, here's the BTP crime map for Redhill.

Mark

https://crimemaps.btp.police.uk/data/6250547/on-train/public-order

 
I'm still on the floor laughing at this one. 

 
I cannot be held responsible for the actions of American Tree Rats.

 
Squirrel this one away for later

 
I'm tempted to refer this article to one particular moderator on this forum for explanation but note that the likelihood is that these creatures are of the upstart grey and not the red variety.

 
Today's Telegraph:

 
While night sleeper passengers will now be kept awake at night by the new BBC drama, another sinister threat has materialised on the North Downs line..

https://www.msn.com/en-gb/travel/news/squirrels-wreak-havoc-onboard-gatwick-train-causing-cancellation/ar-AA1qJAmQ?ocid=BingNewsSerp

Perhaps our Bristolian colleague may care to comment?!

 

Beat me to it!  Which is a shame, since it ruins my excuse to start with "wot no pine martens?"

Here's a fuller report, also from the BBC:

I think my crotchety old friend Mr. Darwin might have something so say about their prediction, though.

 
Well I don't know about you lot, but I think the one in CfN's first pic is a definite swipe-right...

 
A recent report relating to Scotland shows that the increasing numbers of pine martens has boosted the population of red squirrels

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/science-environment-43317564/red-squirrels-boosted-by-pine-martens

 
From the BBC:

 
A rather touching story from Cornwall - from the BBC:

 

When we were in Anglesey last week I was reading a notice at Penrhos Country Park that said that red squirrels are now very common on the island and found in most of the woodlands there. Which was a surprise to me as I've visited Anglesey probably 100 times over the last 30 years and have never seen a red squirrel there, alive or dead (I was aware there were some there as there are signs up on some of the roads alerting people to them, but not 'very common'). The notice did also say that a grey squirrel had recently been seen in the area, so a lot of keen eyes were now looking out for it, to 'remove' it from the island.

 

That was the case in past, but red squirrels can now be seen in several suburbs of London, often beside railway lines.

 
...not forgetting a family of four somewhere near Montpelier Station... 

 

Also quite a healthy population on Anglesey (I've seen some, sadly including a squashed one on the road outside the red squirrel centre...) and reputedly a population in Clocaenog Forest, Denbighshire.

 
In northern Sweden the reindeer are a hazard on road and rail.  I was on a train that has hit such an animal and it was one of locals who explained to me the source  of the unidentifiable bits that flew past the window as the train braked sharply and stopped.  In the discussion about the stupidest animals it may be worth remembering natural instinct. I was told that reindeer usually aim for the high ground when spooked and since the railway is often on embankment they tended to turn their back on the train and run in front. Sadly a loco and coaches doing 70mph is always going to win and the iron-ore trains probably won't try to stop.

Lest I have strayed too far from the thread topic, let me add that red squirrels seem to thrive in Sweden.

 
Hares are far more intelligent than rabbits. One came running up a country lane towards me near White Castle in Monmouthshire a few weeks ago, saw me, doubled back and ran ahead of me at quite a pace until a handy gate appeared on the left. Far cleverer than rabbits and cooler ears too!

 
Good to hear, but ‘numerous’ in London?

 
Brownsea Island, parts of the Lake District, and bits of Northumberland now have significant numbers, thanks to enthusiastic slaughter of the greys in those areas. Formby, near Liverpool, and Anglesey have them too.

 
A whole nest of the little red critters on Brownsea Island when I was last there a couple of years ago.

 
I didn’t think there were any reds other than on the IoW, Scotland and a couple of isolated English towns in the North?

 
When I lived in London, red squirrels were surprisingly numerous, a wildlife expert attributed this this to the large numbers of pet cats in the area.
Cats chase and kill large numbers of grey squirrels thereby leaving more food and space for the red ones. Although cats also the chase the red squirrels, these are almost always too quick for most cats to catch.

My cat killed dozens of greys, but only a single red despite these being locally more numerous.

 
Now, rabbits. They're the real idiots. Followed closely by pheasants.

Whilst driving to Tarr Steps a couple weeks ago I was on a single track road doing my best to avoid the pheasants. They will at least fly out of the way if you get real close to them. I was unsuccessful in bagging one for the pot, although one did hit the bonnet, but as I was barely doing 10mph if just flew off.

After clearing the pheasants and accelerating a little, a rabbit bounds out from the hedgerow and proceeds to run down the middle of the road ahead of me. Darting left and right but never heading for the safety of the hedges either side. Quite a turn of speed has Flopsy. Round bends, past field gates, staying in the road just ahead of me. This went on for a good two minutes. I slowed down, so did he. But he stayed in the road. Not until we approached a dry stone wall did he finally get out of the road.

My dash cam recorded this, but I forgot to hit the 'save' button, so that portion of memory got overwritten.

They really are idiots, including the Scottish ones (fruity language warning):

https://youtu.be/wVN4PRLrpsA

 
When I was very young, I remember a squirrel character called Tufty taught me how to cross a road safely - 'look right, look left' and all that, in educational films shown in primary schools in those days.

Then, when I grew up, I found that squirrels actually have the least road sense of any animal. 

One day last week, driving my van in Long Ashton near Bristol, a squirrel scampered along a lane in front of me. I slowed down, hoping that the little fellow didn't run out into the main road at the junction - but he did.  The driver of an oncoming huge quarry lorry braked quite harshly to avoid hitting the silly animal, which then did a brief double back across the white lines before nipping into an adjoining garden.  I did give the lorry driver a 'thumbs up' gesture of thanks with a grin, as we had both clearly tried to avoid squishing the silly squirrel.

This afternoon, however, I had a quite different experience.  Driving my van down Queens Road in Clifton, I saw something move low down on the nearside. It was a squirrel, which scampered out from the left - across a zebra crossing - then paused at the central island, apparently looking left and right, before scampering on across the zebra crossing to the right hand pavement.  The squirrel then turned left on the pavement and darted right, up into the gardens of one of the big buildings there.

I could only wish that I had a dashboard camera to have recorded that - it really was worthy of posting a clip on youtube!

 

 
From the BBC:


All images (c) Neil McCarty.

 
From the BBC:

 
From the BBC:

 
I saw a pet shop advertising "Baby rabbits in stock". Sounds tasty. "Lightly killed, then poached gently in a perfect court bouillon" or similar.

 
......don't Wetherspoons have a squirrel night? ^5 in a bap hot or cold with a pint of Greene King

 
Spotted on my morning walk today

 
Technically I think they call this type of clue a 'charade' on CAR + MEAR (from 'mearby), but I'm not waiting for a call from the Times crossword dept any time soon.

Yes, you're pretty much there: It is the Luxulyan Valley; specifically the Carmears Tramway, close to where it crosses the Newquay branch on the Treffry Viaduct. A really beautiful neck of the woods, and a walk I'd recommend to anyone who likes a bit of industrial archaeology (which I imagine includes most of us here). I found it remarkable that some rails were still in situ.

Details are here: http://www.luxulyanvalley.co.uk/notices/carmears-path/

 

Knowing how I work on clues, you have me playing with anagrams and looking at "Luxu.." wondering if you were near Luxulyan.  I do recall an ancient railway / plateway across cornwall in that neck of the land.  Am I warm?

 
By way of a (rather contorted) clue, we parked our luxury car in mearby facility.

 
Fair comment. 

My alternative suggestion would have been Portbury. 

 
I've little idea what Shirehampton looks like these days. Not used it in months.

Avonmouth is my preferred 'home' station now following changes to bus routes.

 
Shirehampton.



Sorry - did I say that out loud?     

 
Not the L&CR. But not far away!

 
Liskeard and Caradon Railway?

 
Warm..!

 

I'm tempted to suggest that you were in Cornwall on your way up to Caradon ...

 
Time for another challenge, methinks: This one was taken during a very pleasant stroll with the Squirrel Family. But where were we?

 
While visiting near a well known ATW station with lots of letters I managed to photograph this Gwiwer Goch. 

 
They do make nice burgers.

A suggestion for Mr Boulter if there's a next time... Try a new meaty item on the club menu.

 
Indeed: I have it on the best of authority that if the RSPCA have to treat or otherwise deal with a grey squirrel, the squirrel always apparently manages to 'escape' at the end of the incident, rather than 'be released'. 

 

Section 14(1) of the Wildlife and Countryside Act 1981 (as amended) states that:


Part I of Schedule 9 does indeed include grey squirrel. Mr Boulter may have been better advised to have requested anonymity.

 
It could have been a vexed squirrel trying to drown its sorrows over the sad state of affairs at Broadway... however, things seem to be improving on that front: http://www.firstgreatwestern.info/coffeeshop/index.php?topic=2350.msg179399#msg179399

 
I wonder if he had been drinking Carling Black Label  (Who else remembers this being on Telly!)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aY9GBl7UmVs

 
hope he wasn't looking for nobbys  nuts!

 
He must have been nuts

 


Slightly tenuous FGW link, but the story made me smile. I do hope it was not the Coffee Shop's own resident squirrel?!

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-hereford-worcester-33541502

 
We need fewer (if any) Grey Squirrels, but you may not need a shotgun. Apparently, culling them doesn't even work very well, their populations recover quickly. A better approach, it is claimed, is to scare the grey squirrels into leaving, using pine martens. Sounds a bit too good to be true to me, but if it works...

 
From the BBC:


 

 
From the BBC:

 
We have enjoyed some great humour and lively discussion on the subject of squirrels, on this railway forum ( ) - so I've now taken the opportunity to move and merge all such previous posts here, in this definitive topic on the subject. 

 
Tis true. Must try harder!

 
Squirrel's not travelled far from the location that started this topic.

Round the bend to Worcester Shrub Hill.

 
Meanwhile - where was that squirrel last Sunday?

 

Aw, shucks!

 
Vote cast.

Although disappointed that there was no option: 'Eat Grey, spare Red.' 

 
In view of the clear interest in this particular topic, I'm adding a poll to measure opinion. 

 
That's quite understandable: the red squirrel is more usually seen at or around ground or lower vegetation level - the grey squirrel is generally to be seen showing off in the higher branches.

Where, according to FT,N!, the most appropriate response is to deploy a shotgun in the traditional manner. 

 
Indeed. it wasn't meant to be much of a challenge; I just thought the Upper Concourse looked particularly impressive - but then it was the first chance I've had to look at it properly!

 
Looks like a red Squirrel was to be seen at Reading.

 
Well, to wrench this vaguely back in the direction of the OP: Where was I last night? 

 
This topic has covered a lot of ground since leaving Worcester Foregate Street ... 

 

I'm told I have a speech impediment - leaving out my arse (or is that r-s) and as such I read that as a verbal contact (which to me is a posh modern term for "argument" or "conversation") and oral contact (a post modern term for either "bite" or "kiss").  Thank goodness we're in the lighter side where I can post in a jovial manner about my initial misreading!

 
An interesting discussion may arise from a comparison between a verbal contract (that is, one generally expressed in written words) and an oral contract (that is, one using spoken words rather than written words).  Both are apparently enforceable.

See http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oral_contract 

 
Right, well two can play at that game!

 

I thought my amended signature would have confirmed that!

 

I presume you appreciate I mean Groucho rather than Karl...